Positive Principles Newsletter
March 2007
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“Where we do not respect, we cease to love.”
-
Benjamin Disraeli
“Let every man be respected as an individual and no man idolized.”
-
Albert Einstein
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This month's tip – Respect the person more than
the position.
John was a good manager. He worked hard. He met his goals. He provided
great service to his clients, and he developed great relationships with his
suppliers.
As a customer, Bill had worked with John on several projects. In fact, John
and Bill had become pretty good friends. Bill liked and respected John.
John treated him well, sought his advice when appropriate, and listened to
his input. Bill was not at the same organizational level as John, but John
viewed Bill as a professional peer with regard to experience and ability.
One day, a job came open in John’s department. Bill had recently expressed
a desire to change his situation, so John spoke to him about the open
position. Bill thought that it looked good, so he interviewed with John’s
supervisor. They offered Bill the position, and he accepted. Bill thought
the fit was good, and he looked forward to working with John in a new
capacity.
Bill hit the ground running. He immediately began to positively impact
John’s department. John’s supervisor praised him for bringing Bill
onboard. John never passed the praise on to Bill.
Several months after joining him, Bill noticed that John no longer acted on
his suggestions. John always listened politely, but he always told Bill
what was wrong with his ideas. Bill also noticed that John no longer sought
his advice. John gradually treated Bill with less and less personal
respect.
Bill continued to do good work and to make a difference, but he no longer
enjoyed working with John. Bill saw that the respect and trust John had
placed in him had shifted to the person who took Bill’s position with his
former employer – John’s customer.
Two years after changing positions, Bill felt pretty disenchanted with
John. He began looking for new opportunities with an employer who would
respect him and value his input. John no longer seemed to be that person.
What happened between John and Bill? Bill did not change his treatment of
John. Bill continued to do a good job and to give his best efforts. Yet
John changed the way he related to Bill. When Bill became John’s
subordinate, the relationship changed and John lost his respect for Bill.
Why did John lose his respect for Bill? Because John respects positions
more than he does people.
In Bill’s former role, John respected the position Bill held as a customer.
So, John treated Bill with respect. John did not respect the position of
the people who reported to him, so he did not treat them with respect. He
tolerated them, but he did not respect them. Once Bill recognized this
dynamic, he no longer wanted to stay in that environment. John lost a
valuable team member because he failed to recognize a key principle in human
relations; most people prefer to be respected for who they are and not for
what they do.
So for now, I encourage you to remember this month's tip . . .
Respect
the person more than the position.
Have a great day,
Guy Harris
The Recovering Engineer
